Unknown Existence

I know this is alot to read, although, it is an incomplete story. I have a few. I hope you like what I have though. Please let me know if it is worth finishing.



Prologue

I never considered that monsters might exist; that they might be all around me. I never thought that one day I would be introduced to these creatures; that one would become my friend, my lover. I never imagined that my life would change and never change back. And now, as I lie on an ally floor, waiting to die, I’m introduced to the full extent of the evil that has been so close, all this time; an unknown existence that has now revealed itself to my father and me; an existence that I will be aware of for the rest of my life.
















Chapter 1

It’s just an ordinary, humid summer day on the east coast and just like the rain drops falling outside, tears are falling from my eyes. I don’t know why I cry any more. I’ve done this so many times and now, I only have to do it one more time. Maybe that’s why. Maybe I’m crying because I’m happy; because I, Kate Lanley will never have to say goodbye to another group of friends or get used to another school mid year again.
My dad works for an important company and eighteen years ago, he got promoted. Since then, my dad has been transferred from state to state, working with different parts of the company. We’ve moved twenty times in those eighteen years. Each time it was a new state, a new house, a new school and a new bunch of friends. And now, I’m about to do it all over again, for the last time. Just one last place I had to get used to.
It would be a little easier if my mom were still around. She died from cancer three years ago. Dad’s had it pretty tough since then. We both have. He had to start working longer hours and I had to take on my mom’s roll around the house and, now that I’m older, a job of my own. It’s the only way I can hope to go to New York – to Julliard.
I’ve had a passion for music since I can remember. Now that I’m in senior year, I plan on getting into Julliard. It would be my escape from all the change and the moving; A place where my music can be my one concentration, the only thing that matters.

(Pardon the incomplete chapter. I will eventually post the completed version.)






Chapter 2

It was a week later when we emptied the last box. The apartment had been in a terrible state. Everything had been covered in dust; the windows were streaked. I’d wondered when the last time was that landlord had actually been in here. It might’ve been ready to go a few months ago. Luckily the floors were hardwood and were easy to clean. It took so long that we had to spend another night in the car. My neck was not in good shape.
It was three days until school started and I had just gone to get school supplies. Nothing fancy; I didn’t follow the shopping list the school had provided. One look at it told me that I wouldn’t use half the things listed. So, I stuck to the basics. I had to. There was hardly anything left. I admit I was a little late this year. Usually, I’d already have my supplies by now.
I had been dreading my first day. It was going to be terrible. I hated being center of attention; everyone would be staring my way, wondering “Who’s that weirdo.” OK, it might not be that bad, but, I’d have to do it without my friends. It’s not like freshmen year, when everybody’s just as new as you are. I would be all alone, stuck with a bunch of strangers.

The first day came like the speed of a bullet. I woke up bright and early in the morning, to make sure I caught the bus. My stop was three streets down and at six forty-five, I was not in the mood to walk all that way. Every second of that ten minute walk I was wishing I had a car. But, that was one of the luxuries I’d had to live without. I checked my bag one last time, making sure I had everything, called goodbye to my dad and left.
When I reached my stop I found a small crowd already waiting. It was so embarrassing! Not one of them was a senior. I was taller than most of them. And when I finally came to a stop and dropped my bag to the ground, every single one of them looked up at me. I wanted nothing more than to get away. It was too long after that the bus finally reached our stop. The crowd’s attention turned to something else. I was puzzled; a bus isn’t that exciting. Each of them were wide eyed and staring at the same thing. I followed their gaze and then, understood why they were staring. There, behind the rusty, yellow school bus was a shiny, blue ford pickup. I’ll never understand why, but at that moment, my heart rate sped up. There he was; the most beautiful guy I’d ever met.
He looked impatient and tense. It made me wonder what he had on his mind. It couldn’t be anything good. The music booming from his car wasn’t heavy metal, like it had been the other night. This time, it was jazz. My attention was pulled away when the bus driver started yelling at me.
“Are you going to get on the bus, or what?! I have a schedule to keep up with, you know.”
I realized that I was the only one left on the side walk. How long had I been staring? I bent down to pick up my bag and then stumbled onto the bus, trying not to use up more of the driver’s time. I took the first empty seat I could find and sat, hugging my bag to my chest.
When I got off the bus, just five short minutes later, people were already staring. I could see people all around me leaning into their friends and whispering behind their hands. The high school was huge. My previous high school only had seven hundred kids. This place looked like it held around fifteen hundred. I made my way through the main door, to the office. I handed the secretary a note from my previous school. She nodded once and handed it back.
“How are you doing today?”
“I’m pretty nervous. I’ve never been the “new kid” before.”
“Well, I’m sure you’ll be fine.”
“Now, this is your schedule and a map. Oh, and your locker information is written in the corner of the top paper.”
She handed me the two sheets of paper and told me how to get to my homeroom. It was on the far side of the building, luckily it was a simple path from the office. The halls were filled with people: teachers trying to get to their rooms before their students, kids stopping along the way to catch up with friends and freshmen finding their way around. No lost seniors though. I found the row of lockers that contained mine. Luckily it was right outside the door of my class, easy to remember. I turned the dial this way and that and found that it was stiff. I fought with it for ever, but the handle just wouldn’t lift. I’d managed to get it halfway, when a girl came out of my classroom and saw me struggling.
“Someone said the new girl was having trouble. I see you got stuck with twenty- two. Here, let me help. You have to do it just right.”
I was so grateful. I smiled with appreciation.
“Thank you. If I take any longer, I’m going to miss homeroom.”
“Not a problem.”
She was at my side now and had begun to fiddle with the handle. She pressed it back down and after redoing the combo, jiggled it a little and then pulled it all the way up with some effort. Finally, she put her foot on the locker next door and pulled really hard. Eventually, the door opened.
“You have to do all that just to open it?”
“Yep. It closes fine; I don’t know why it’s so stubborn. Anyway, you better hurry. You’ve got two minutes. My name’s Michelle Burton, by the way.”
“Kate Lanley. Thanks again. I’ll see if I can remember how to do that later.”
I’d run out of time so, instead of setting up my locker, I threw my bag on the bottom and pulled out my things. Ok, here was the fun part. Not! The moment I walked into the classroom I could tell my teacher was going to make me stand up front and introduce myself. The room was a lot bigger than anything I was used to. The walls were a pale blue and covered in bare display boards, waiting to be filled. People were already sat in their seats and catching up with friends. And then the teacher stood up and called the room to order.
“Alright guys, if I could have your attention. We have a new student this year, her name is Kate Lanley and she is from Texas.”
“Hi Kate!” everyone greeted in animated unison.
The teacher then turned his attention to me.
“Welcome Kate, my name is Mr. Wyatt. Go ahead and take the seat next to Miss. Burton.”
She waved at me from the center of the room. I could already see that we were going to get along. Of course, as I made my way to the empty desk beside her, everyone followed me with their eyes. I plopped my books on the desk and sat down at the graffiti covered desk, embarrassed.

I had math and science for my first two periods. My two best subjects; for once, it wasn’t a good thing. Getting everything right only made people stare for longer. I stopped putting my hand up eventually. I couldn’t handle another wave of stares. Luckily, Michelle was there in math and helped me through it.
My next class was advanced music. I’ve always loved music and have been playing the violin since I was six. I exceeded a lot faster than the other kids in my class and when I was thirteen; my teacher put me in the advanced class. Since then, I’d been doing all of the solos for school competitions. I was hoping I might get into Julliard School of Music, next year.
My music class took place in auditorium one. It wasn’t too hard to find; I’d passed it on the way to the office this morning. It was the largest of the auditoriums and when I got inside, I gulped at the size of the stage. The teacher beckoned me over to the stage and I made the long walk to its steps. She met me at the top and shook my hand. “Miss. Lanley, welcome. I am Mrs. Cheney. Now, it says here that you play first violin.” She said, referring to a clipboard in her hand.
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Well, this is good; we only have one first violin in the group. I fact, let me introduce you to him.”
She turned to the rest of the class for a moment and called to a guy that was stood off the side. I couldn’t see who it was until he was by the teacher’s side. It was him. My mouth dropped open in surprise. No matter how many times I saw him, my mind would always melt.
“Kate, this is Josh Miller. Josh, this is our new student, Kate Lanley,”
He looked as shocked as I was and of course, his body was tensed. I felt intimidated – I didn’t understand the reason why – It was as if my instincts were trying to tell me something. I took a step back. I must’ve been closer to the edge of the stage than I thought. I lost my balance and tried to stop myself unsuccessfully and began to fall. I was expecting to land on the ground with a thud, but instead, something caught my wrist. It was Josh. I knew that before I opened my eyes to see, as his smooth, cold skin wrapped itself around me. Before my feet left the stage floor, he pulled me back up and made sure I was steady on my feet.
“You should be more careful.” he looked at me with a kind of warning in he eyes. “Really.”
He actually talked to me! Like last time, he’d now become more composed. His face had become calm and expressionless. I was too surprised by his quick movements and his silky voice to reply. I just stood there, gaping at him. It was then that Mrs. Cheney put her hands on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes. I could see a look of concern on her face.
“Kate, are you OK? That could’ve been a nasty fall. Did you hurt anything?”I managed to shake myself to my senses.
“No. I’m fine; Josh caught me just in time.”
I shot a glance in his direction and managed a small smile in thanks. He managed a small, beautiful smile in response.
“Well, as long as you’re sure you’re alright,” she turned to Josh. “Josh, Kate’s going to be playing first with you. I’m sure you’ll enjoy the company. Could you show her to her seat?”
Without reply, he turned and headed to where the other violinists were already sat. He took a vacant chair from the side and offered it to me.
“Thanks.” I muttered, before sitting.
“No problem.” He sounded like he was holding his breath. Before I could react to the sudden speech, he left my side and took the seat next to me, edging it as far away from me as possible. I could feel his cold temperature from where I sat. I began to take out my instrument as Mrs. Cheney began talking about what we were going to be playing for our first performance of the year; music was being passed along the rows.
“Now, ladies and gentlemen,” she began. “For the fall performance we will be playing a famous piece that has been played by some of the most popular orchestras in the country. It’s very complex and has quite a fast tempo. If any of you find you are having difficulty, feel no shame. This is the hardest piece we’ve played. I want you to know that as always I am here, after school every day and would be more than happy to work on it with you. There is absolutely no pressure.”
She paused for a moment while she organized her music stand. I tried to ignore Josh’s presence next to me while I tried to listen to her, I had a feeling that his eyes were on my face. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. I was right. He was being so strange. All the time it seemed like he was fighting between two choices, two needs.
“I would like to hear each of you play the first twelve bars – up to the repeat. It’s just to see if we’ve been practicing over the vacation, which I hope all of you did.” She turned her attention first to me. “Miss. Lanley, if you please. I’ll count you in.”
She gave me a small intro and then I began. From that point on, my mind pushed aside everything in my head; I just focused on the black notes of the page. My bow slid through the notes with fluency and speed. There wasn’t a single time that I faltered; I’d never heard of this piece before. It was an intense, suspenseful piece, but there was something about it that I liked. When I reached the twelfth measure, all too soon the whole room was silent. I looked around me, hoping that a sound would break the awkward silence. My eyes finally reached Josh. He was wide eyed, mouth open, just like everybody else in the room. I looked at my teacher with a pleading gaze. Please say something. Seeming to understand my expression, she began to clap.
Everyone followed. After a minute she raised a hand and the loud sound finally ceased.
“That was very, very good, Kate. You should be proud of yourself.” I blushed at the comment.
I could feel Josh stiffen besides me. Why did he keep doing that?
“Josh, your turn.”
He readied his violin, positioning it under his chin. He began without a count. He was brilliant. Just as flawless as the rest of him. I looked at him, shocked in return. When he finished, he caught my awed stare; the corner of his lip turned up in a smile. The rest of the class took their turn, playing their parts. Everyone made at least one mistake, although all played well. I was relieved when the period was finally over. People hadn’t stopped staring since I played. Josh was gone before I could even pick up my case. He was beginning to get on my nerves. A girl introduced herself as she was on her way out.
"Hey, my name’s Kelsi Daniels. Your playing is amazing. Are you planning on majoring in music?”
“Actually, I want to try out for Julliard.”
“You’ll get in.”
“Thanks.” I was flattered by her compliment. I didn’t think I was that good.

The following two periods were just as bad. I was introduced, people stared, I got everything right and it dragged on. Well, lunch finally came. I went to my locker to put my things away. I fought with the stubborn door. Maybe I’d just take my things with me tomorrow. Finally, it opened. I threw my things inside the cramped compartment and grabbed my lunch. As I shut the locker door, Michelle came to my side. She’d invited me to eat lunch with her and her friends; I’d met most of them already in my classes. She led the way to the cafeteria. At the doors, her friends were waiting. She introduced me to all of them, pointing to every one of them as she said their names.
“Kate, these are my friends. Let’s see, we have: Abby, Kelsi, Taylor and Tiffany. Guys, this is my friend Kate.”
“Hi, Kate” they all said together welcomingly.
I just smiled and waved back. I was too shy to do much more today.
“So, do we want to eat out in the courtyard? It’s too warm inside.” Kelsi suggested.
Everyone looked around the group making sure we were all for the idea. Each one nodded in agreement.
“OK then. Kate, if you just follow us, the courtyard’s this way.”
We crossed the busy cafeteria and went through some double doors. On the other side, there were about twenty picnic tables. It was pretty nice actually. They even had flower beds dotted around the edge. Michelle led the way to a table at the far end. We all took our place on its blue, wooden benches. Immediately, the table began to bubble with conversation. Sometimes they would ask me a question about where I came from and the things I like.
“She’s planning on Julliard next year.” Kelsi mentioned.
“Really! What do you play?”
“The violin. I’ve always had a passion for music. I have a music theory class this after…”
My voice trailed off as something caught my eye. There, in the closest corner of the court to us, Josh was leaning against the wall. He was alone, eyes on the ground. He was listening to music through a pair of wireless head phones. Another thing he can afford. He must’ve noticed that I was staring, because he suddenly looked in my direction. His eyes zoned right in on my face. I felt my stomach drop.
“Kate? What are you staring at?”
I’d forgotten I was in the middle if a conversation. Our eyes were still locked. When I didn’t reply, they all turned to see what I was looking at. They turned back. All of them had an expression on their faces that I couldn’t decipher. He broke our gaze then and stared down at the ground again; his lips had turned up into that small smile I never seemed to survive. I turned back to my friends.
“Kate, do you know who was just looking at you?” Taylor asked.
“Yeah. Josh Miller. Why?”
“He’s only the most gorgeous guy in the whole school. He never makes contact with anybody and he certainly doesn’t stare at them, like that!” Tiffany cried.
“He seems a little strange. Every time I get close to him, he just goes all tense and wide eyed. In my music class he sat as far away from me as he could. I bumped into him just before school started. He helped me up and it was like he didn’t want to let go of my wrist.”
“That is odd. He isn’t usually like that.” Abby sat thoughtful for a minute and then her face lit up.
“Maybe he likes you.”
At that suggestion, the whole table squealed. My cheeks flushed red. I glanced up at Josh, wondering if he’d heard. He was still there. He was laughing to himself. I looked away. A fresh blotch of color painting my face.

The rest of the day began to drag. I just wanted out of the crowd. Every moment of the day there’d been a pair of eyes in me. And, to make matters worse, Josh was in my music theory class. I keep fighting with two types of feelings. One was how unnaturally perfect he looked, how I felt when I saw him and the other was just pure annoyance at how he acted around me. I was going to have to talk to him about that at some point. How, I wasn’t sure. When I got home, my dad met me at the door.
“So, how’d it go? Dare I ask?”
“It was so long. Every time I answered something right or walked into a room, people stared at me. Both music classes were great but terrible at the same time…”
I continued to ramble on about my day and about Josh as we went inside. I told him about my friends and what I thought of everybody. Kelsi, Michelle and Abby seemed really nice. Tiffany seemed a bit more out of it than everybody else. Taylor seemed a bit like the popular cheerleader of the group. I didn’t think we’d get along too well.

The next three days were the same. I fought with my locker, dazzled in music and I caught Josh staring at me every lunch; he still stayed away from me. Luckily, homework wasn’t heavy, since it was the first week. Also, people didn’t look my way as much now.
It was now Friday and I was headed for music. I loved this class and the music was a challenge. Plus, Josh would be there. We went through the music, going slowly and then at normal tempo. We only had to stop once or twice. The people in this class were so talented. My day got interesting, when it sadly came to an end.
“Alright guys, that was great. Thank you to those of you who are already working out your kinks, with me. Have a good day!” she smiled at all of us and then turned her attention to the first violin section. “Lanley, Miller, I’d like to talk to you for a moment.”
I shot a glance at him. What could Mrs. Cheney want that put me and him in the same sentence? I packed up my instrument and went over to her stand; Josh followed always three feet away. Mrs. Cheney shuffled her music a little more and then pulled out two pieces.
“As both of you know, the fall performance is coming up in one month. I would like the two of you to do a duet.”
Did she just ask what I thought she’d asked? I couldn’t play with him! Not when he was so perfect, not when he was so tense around me. Yet, it would give me some time to find out what made him tick. Should I?
“This is the piece you’ll be playing. I need one of you to play second and one to play first. You’ll need to be practicing after school every day. You’ll have the time to yourself; I’ll have you play it for me once a week, to hear your progress. Is this OK?”
I could see that Josh was about to protest, but he wasn’t getting away so easily this time. I cut him off, before he could start.
“I’d love to do this. It would be a great way to get to know each other and I’m up for the challenge.”
She looked at Josh. He was going to say no, I could tell. He was frustrated that I’d beat him to it. Then, his face took on a new sense of composure and to my surprise, he agreed.
“That would be fine. I’d like to see what this girl’s got.”
Girl? How old did he think I was? Six?
“Very well then. You can start on Monday. I’ll see you straight after. Maybe you could take it easy for the first few practices. One needs to know the other, to turn a song into a beautiful melody. Now, run along or you’ll be late.”
Josh was easily keeping my pace. I could tell he was angry by the fire in his eyes. And then, he stepped in front of me; forcing me to stop. His breathing was heavy.
“Trust me, Kate. You don’t want to know me.”
Before I could respond, he stormed off down the hall. He was out of sight almost too quickly. It seemed as if everyday things just got stranger. I continued down the hall in a half run. I was so, so late. I almost fell through the door of my next class. My English teacher, Mr. Michaels shot me a stern look and then gestured me to my seat. We were discussing Shakespeare at the moment; One of my most favorite topics.
At lunch, I found myself under the watchful eyes of Josh Miller, drilling into me from his corner. He seemed to have calmed down, but I could still seem a slight tint of annoyance in his stare.
He stood there every day. He never ate lunch. Sometimes I found myself staring back. It was as if his deep, grey eyes lured me in, like it was some kind of natural talent meant for something more. A predator attracting its prey.





Chapter 3

What a week it had been. I realized that I hadn’t thought of my friends since the first day. My head had been filled with so much confusion. I’d been so busy with classes and Josh. When I got through the door, I went straight upstairs, to look at me e-mail. Of course, my inbox was filled with message after message. I felt so guilty. They were all worried about me and at some points, they even got a little snippy.

Kate? You haven’t called. Is everything OK? Mail me OK.

Alice.

Come on, Kate. It’s been days! I’m beginning to get worried. Where are you?

Vicky.

Ok. This is ridiculous! It’s been weeks. Are we so unimportant that you can’t even tell us you’re OK? You could at least send us a hello!

Sarah, Alice, Vicky.

I’d done nothing all week, yet I’d failed to talk to my friends. My mind had been filled with so much stress, confusion and Josh. What kind of a friend was I? I opened up a fresh e-mail straight away.

Hi guys. I am so sorry! I should’ve replied the moment I set up. School has been so crazy this week. That’s no excuse though. I’m really sorry. Will you forgive me?

I thought for a moment. Should I tell them about Josh? No. they won’t be able to give me any advice about him; they don’t know him. I’d see what I could find out about him first. I signed my name at the bottom and hit the send button. Now what to do? For once, I actually had a longing for Monday to come.

When the bell rang Monday afternoon, I made my way to the auditorium. As I got closer to its doors, I began to feel nervous, unsure, yet excited and happy. I knew it was the thought of being alone with Josh, but what I didn’t understand was why he did this to me. When I reached the double large doors of the auditorium, I paused and took a deep breath before I pushed them open to reveal its big stage.
Josh was already there, leaning against the left wall; his instrument at his feet. I ran down the side of the huge room. There was just so much tension. He still looked frustrated and I couldn’t help thinking he was holding a grudge about something I did.
When I reached the top of the stairs, I brushed past him and silently began to take out my violin. I felt something cold next to me. I looked up to find Josh looking down at me. There was no expression on his face. I slowly stood up and kicked my case to the side. He was beginning to make me really nervous. I sidestepped from under his glare, but his eyes only followed.
“What?”
“Nothing. I was just watching.”
“Well, couldn’t you have done that from where you were standing?”
“I could’ve done.”
I hated all of this short sentence rubbish. I sighed, rolling my eyes. I held up the music in my hand.
“Which one do you want? I don’t mind if you want first.” I did, but I wanted to at least try and get along. It seemed like that was going to be a hard task.
“You take it. Like I said on Friday, I want to see what you’ve got.”
I stepped closer to him so he could take the music from my hand. He took a step back. I just looked at him; this was stupid. I shook he piece of paper until - when it began to get on his nerves - he finally reached out and took it. I grabbed a stand from the tangled clutter and went to set up in the center. Josh followed and placed his stand a short distance away from me. I tried to ignore how this made me feel. I couldn’t be that bad.
“Do you want to count us in or shall I do it?”
“I will.”
He gave us a simple count and we began. The piece was one I knew; my favorite. It was the piece from the newest Pride and Prejudice; when Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth were dancing together for the first time. I moved from note to note with a much grace as I could. It was such a beautiful song. Josh’s second part was so wonderful. Sometimes I think second sounds better than first. When the music came to an end, we were both quiet for a moment. I noticed that I could no longer feel the cold of Josh’s body by my side. I looked up from my music and found him across the room. That was it! I couldn’t take it any longer. I went to stand right in front of him.
“What is your problem? Since before I even came into this school, you’ve been avoiding me. And whenever I do get close, you just stand there, wide eyed and don’t say anything. What is it about me that you just can’t stand?”
“It’s nothing. You’d go running down the hall if I told you.”
“Humor me.” He looked torn; like he wanted to say something. “Well?”
He shook his head and pushed himself off of the wall.
“You don’t understand.” He turned to leave, but it was driving me crazy. I needed to know. Not thinking, I reached out and caught him by his wrist. He stopped and glared at me. Then, before I could realize I was moving, he flung me around and caged me against the wall. I was wide eyed in shock and fear, my heartbeat so fast it hurt. Stopping him wasn’t a good idea. His pale hands were pressed against the wall on either side of me; his cold body, just inches from mine.
“It’s not what I don’t like and can’t stand, Kate.” He voice was angry, but after all that, it was still silky and inviting. “It’s what I want. Understand this. I-am-dangerous. When I said you didn’t want to know me, I meant it.”
He moved away from me and left the room. The moment he was gone, I slid down to the floor in relief. I sat for a minute, allowing my heart to calm down. What was crazy was that my heart didn’t beat that way just because of the fear, it was being so close, that we were so close to touching. I sat there until my legs were numb.
My dad knew what I was doing and who I was doing it with, but he didn’t know what Josh was like. When I came through the door and shut it behind me, I leaned on it for a second, glad to be within the safety of my own home. Because I stayed after so late, there was no buss to take me home; I’d walked the whole way. My dad met me at the door like he usually did.
“How was rehearsal?”
“It was short. We didn’t start off too great. I’m sure we’ll get better, I mean I just met him.”
“Well, let’s just hope you can work it out by the performance. It would be a real shame if it didn’t. I know how important this is to you.”
I wished I could tell him what happened, but I knew he’d stop me from performing with Josh. Regardless of what had occurred tonight, I wanted to do this with him. I couldn’t explain it. Why did I want to spend time with him? He’d just pinned me to a wall. I should want to stay away from him at all costs. But I didn’t. Somehow it made me want to be with him more. What he said to me today made me even more curious. It’s not what I don’t like or can’t stand, Kate. It’s what I want.
I went up to my room. I’d actually received homework today and I had to get it finished. I had to eat dinner yet and work on my Julliard piece. The requirements for my audition were that I had to compose my own. I had written pages of notes over the years. Some were good others were just notes. I was thinking of trying to make something out of them.
My bedroom was small, but my own. I loved colors like aqua and blue. The walls of my room were white, my bed was a reddish wood; the covers had aqua, blue and green circles. My windows were dusty, but they were large and opened wide. I took my book bag and dumped it on the floor besides my round chair. Sitting down, I pulled out my math binder. I liked this subject, but I preferred to leave it in the classroom. It wasn’t too hard. I’d already covered this topic at my old school. When I was done with my homework, I went downstairs to get something to eat. I threw some slices of bread into the toaster and went to sit with my dad while I waited.
He was sitting in the small front room, watching the news. I made my way to the couch where he was sitting and sat down beside him. It was such a different temperature to the one I’d felt all day. In a way, I liked the cold feel of Josh. It was refreshing in the summer heat. The thought was broken off when the toast popped up in the kitchen. I went over and quickly buttered it, before wolfing it down. I hadn’t realized how hungry I was. I’d barely eaten my lunch because Josh had been staring at me again. I still didn’t understand his weird actions, but I knew I would. I’d make sure of that.
When I was back in my room, I headed to my bedside table and pulled out a pile of manuscript and my violin. I had some work cut out for me. I grabbed a pencil from my desk – which was in one corner of my room – and sat in my chair. I thought for a moment, trying to hear a song in my head. Nothing was coming. I kept getting flashes of Josh instead; how he’d looked so torn, like he didn’t want to keep me out. I shook the thought out of my mind – it was so stupid - and turned my eyes to the paper in front of me.
An hour had passed, still blank. I sat there until my eyes began to get heavy. I’d scrawled down a few notes, but nothing to make a song out of. Maybe I needed to look around for inspiration. Still, I tried to think of more to write. It wasn’t long after that I fell asleep, my music still in my lap and violin on the floor. It had been midnight. Like always when I was working on my music, I forgot about everything else. Including the fact that I a good night’s sleep to do well in school.

I woke up, my neck sore. My dad must’ve found me, because there was now a blanket draped over my still tired form. My music had been moved and my violin was in its case. I felt a lump in my throat. Mom was the one who usually did this when I fell asleep while working. I swallowed down the tears and went to get fresh clothes from my closet. I picked out the shirt I bought that first day and a matching flowery skirt. I tied my curled blond hair into a high pony and went downstairs.
My dad was in the kitchen, reading the newspaper. I went over to the pantry and pulled out a box of cereal. I didn’t usually eat a proper breakfast, but I figured that if Josh was going to stare at lunch, I wasn’t going to be able to eat much. I sat opposite my dad at our tiny dining table and began to eat.
“You look very pretty today.” My dad commented.
“Thanks.”
“Why so dressed up?”
I was puzzled by the question. I looked down at my outfit, tying to see the meaning of his question. I realized that I was a little overdressed.
“I just felt like wearing it. I haven’t in ages and wanted to before the season ends.”
This was true, but it wasn’t the reason why I’d put it on. In fact, I wasn’t even sure why. My dad looked doubtful, but he didn’t press it further. I finished my breakfast in silence. Glancing at the clock I realized I was going to be late. I flew from my seat and put my bowl in the sink before grabbing my bag and running out the door.
“Sorry dad, but I’ve got to go.” I yelled on my way out.

The morning seemed to be very slow. It was as if third period would never come. I wanted to apologize to Josh for yelling at him. I was also hoping that I’d get an apology for what he did to me. But, when I finally entered auditorium one, Josh was nowhere to be seen. I tried to ignore the wave of disappointment that suddenly washed over me as I sat down and got ready to play.
Throughout the whole class, I must’ve looked towards the door about a thousand times, half hoping for him to walk in late. But, he never did. That class, I made more mistakes than I’d ever done in my life. Kelsi met me at the end of class, concern in her blue eyes.
“Is everything OK, Kate? You don’t seem like yourself today.”
“It’s nothing. I’ve just got a lot on my mind.” She didn’t look convinced. “Honestly, Kelsi. I’m fine. Thanks though,”
I smiled at her, trying to back up my words. She smiled back and left the room, still a little skeptical.

Lunch came and as I was heading for my locker, I was still holding onto some small, ridiculous hope that Josh might be in his corner. I dropped my bags on the floor, preparing to wrestle with my locker. I still hadn’t mastered it perfectly yet and was expecting o spend at least five minutes getting it open. I turned the dial and jiggled the handle. But before I could try to force it up, a white hand reached over my shoulder and pulled it up and opened it with no effort at all. I froze solid and my heart began to pound. It could only be one person.